Friday, March 13, 2015

The working world

It’s been four weeks now that I’ve been back in the working world. The adult world. The land of normalcy. It has not been easy. The pressure and stress of getting to work on time, home on time, doing good work at the office, leaving Parker at home, the balance and rhythm of it all—no, not easy.


But as my mantra has been since Parker was born: one day at a time.



And with that, it is getting easier. Parker is doing wonderfully with our nanny. They clearly love each other and it’s so reassuring knowing that Parker is having a good day, every day, while I’m at the office.



She’s starting to notice everything. Her feet and Milo are her current obsessions.



She’s nearly sleeping through the night. I’m going to give up the “dream feed”—when I wake her to nurse at 11:30pm, the idea being that it will sate her until dawn—and in a few weeks when she reaches six months, I’ll hopefully also stop pumping in the middle of the night. When she and I are both going to bed and waking up at normal hours, without any middle-of-the-night sessions, it will be a whole new ballgame.



And then I can take up with some of my old habits. Namely, exercising and writing.



I’ve been at my pre-pregnancy weight for months now. Which is great, but somewhat meaningless. Your body just changes when you have a baby. My belly is droopy and crepey and unless I invest in pilates or barre classes to tighten that shit up, which I don’t see myself doing, it might just stay like that. Forever. I’m trying to wean myself from my truck driver diet, but I’m also trying to enjoy it while I’m still breastfeeding and can get away with such gluttony. But I figure if I can get back to the gym and yoga in the meantime, so I can start feeling strong again, I will be halfway there.



And I want to write about all of these experiences! NY Mag is doing some great writing about pregnancy and parenthood these days. I have a book proposal that I started a year ago and needs a shot of love or risks withering on the vine. But I have yet to find any substantial chunk of time to focus on it. In time, in time…right??



I’m also excited to date my husband again. He has been my rock these past few months and I am in awe of how my love for him keeps growing. Like, how did he happen to me? How was he not taken already? He’s a dreamboat. He makes me feel reassured, normal, optimistic, safe and comforted about everything. I love just being with him, and it’s been fun watching The Wire, Mad Men and House of Cards during these long, cold winter months. But I’m hoping to get out on the town with him a little more—dinners, drinks and romantic times, oh yes.



It’s feeling a bit like a new dawn. Other parents say we're entering a golden period with Parker. From 5-12 months, or 6-8, depending who you ask. But the promise of even more fun and sweetness sounds pretty great. 

14 comments:

  1. Amy I love your honesty! Parker is so delicious (and I love that she's obsessed with Milo!). Hang on in there - sounds like things are definitely on the up!

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  2. Personally, I think the dream stage with the child is from birth to when they go to school and then it is still pretty dreamy until they reach the old age of 16 .. then it is good if you can ship them off to school until they are in their 20's lol
    Parker looks delicious .. I am glad you are managing so well. I am sorry you are not there with her as much as you wish but that you have her to begin with. You take what you've got and you enjoy it .. whatever and however .. this is the way I am trying to look at things :)
    I just have one regret ... that we are not neighbors and I could have a little Parker time in person.
    luv u .. C

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  3. I've heard the golden age lasts until at least age 8! :) So happy things are going well -- the creative stuff gets easier with more

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  4. I just love hearing all about this new adventure of yours and Andrew's and Parker's. I don't have kids and haven't spent much time around them, so it always surprises me to hear what they are doing at such a young age. Biology and physiology is magic! Glad to hear you're adjusting to things and that, even if you can't be home all day, you've found someone who fits into your group so well. And I have to say, as a 45-year old single person, hearing about your continuing love story with your husband who remained out there waiting for you to find him gives me great hope that I may not end my days solo.

    (And also, I love Candace's comment about shipping off the kids to school from 16 to 20. hee!)

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  5. PS ..When I got pregnant , I weight under 110 lbs .. I gained over 40 lbs with each of my two babies and my belly did not stay crepey and soft .. there were stretch marks and even those faded with time. So don't think it is automatic, that this is the way it will be. Your body has only had 5-6 months to adjust to being back to normal .. it will still tighten up and get back to almost pre-baby normal.

    I am so very glad that Parker likes her Nanny. Of course Nanny likes Parker !

    Laura, I am glad you loved the comment .. you have teenagers ? lol

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  6. Thanks, friends. I appreciate you keeping up with the adventure, along with your words of support and advice!

    Laura, I'm a big believer that you are where you're meant to be. And that we subconsciously guide ourselves to certain places/people/destinations. If you want to be with someone, it will be so!

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  7. What you're saying is completely true. I know that everybody must say the same thing, but I just think that you put it in a way that everyone can understand. I'm sure you'll reach so many people with what you've got to say.

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