Oh, hello

Yes, we’re still here in Brooklyn, living in a little cocoon of new parenthood. Sometimes it’s blissful. It’s raining outside and I’m inside, eating m&m’s and watching Footloose on AMC.

Other times it’s tough, really tough. Parker is screaming, I’m starving, my teeth feel fuzzy, my nipples are on fire, and I wonder what day it is, why I’m doing this, will it ever get easier.

And it always does. The little lessons that emerge along the way: This too shall pass. One day at a time. Be in the moment. Find something positive in what is difficult. Count your blessings. Clichés, all, but true and comforting nonetheless. The love from family and friends, near and far, is astonishing.

And one week slides into another. Parker is now nine weeks old (nine weeks old!!). She’s regained her birth weight and eats like a champ. She’s able to chill out on her own for as long as 20 or 30 minutes. We can tease smiles out of her. And she is absolutely delicious.

Oh, and speaking of delicious, I’ve gotten out to some new spots. Doughnut Plant debuted in Brooklyn pretty much down the street from us. Tres dangereux.

And last weekend I had my first extended break for a hair appointment in Soho. Andrew stayed home and gave Parker bottles and danced to entertain her. I rode the subway, pumped in a bathroom, got a fabulous blow-out and tried, Maman, this killer new French café that has introduced some of the best cookies in the city. I felt part of the human race again.

I’m about midway through my maternity leave. I’m starting to meet other new moms, look into childcare, and fall deeper in love with Parker. It’s bee an interesting exploration of self and identity. After a couple decades of being so focused on a writing career, being home without the ability or ambition to write (to say nothing of exercising, keeping up on news, engaging with the community) is weird. It’s hard. I can feel alienated and adrift, wondering what I’m going to do from here. What I want to do. Sometimes when I tell Andrew that I did nothing all day, he corrects me and points out that I kept a little human being alive. Enough said. I mean, look at her!!

So here we are. Me and my girl. In love with her and my husband. Embracing the nuttiness. Wondering about the future. Another day. Lucky me.

Sweet Thanksgiving

So much to be grateful for this year. The family that has enveloped me in love for 42 years. My friends who have helped shape me into the person I am. My health. My good fortune. All my memories, dreams and opportunities from throughout the years. And my new family: my husband and this sweet little lamb.

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. May your days be filled with love, wonder, copious amounts of food and whatever makes you happy and at peace. xo

Life on the inside

Parker is now six weeks old. It's funny how the days and weeks are simultaneously long and short. So much happens (like, her brain growing five centimeters so far and little fat rolls slowly forming on her jambes), and yet we do nothing but eat, read and take walks.

This is what a typical day at home looks like.

And evening.

And every moment in between.

It's nothing. And everything.

The comfort of pie & a great French giveaway

When I first met Ann Mah in Paris, there was an immediate kinship. She had previously lived in New York and was a wonderful writer of mostly food and travel pieces—a girl after my own heart. Plus, she was understatedly cool, modest, and a great conversationalist. Over the past few years, that admiration of Ann evolved into a friendship with many parallels in our lives: we both returned to New York, published books, and are now mothers.

Ann had a beautiful baby girl, Lucy, a little over a year ago. As I approached my due date, she was full of helpful suggestions and down to earth advice (which, if you’re a mom, you know is not as common as you might think or hope). And when she actually offered to cook a chicken pot pie with parsley biscuits for us the week after Parker was born, I was all too happy and grateful to accept.

So, you think that shows Ann’s thoughtful, generous nature? Now take into consideration that she made the offer—and the beautiful pot pie—in the midst of her paperback release of her New York Times-acclaimed book, Mastering the Art of French Eating.

I thought it only appropriate to spread the generosity, and yumminess, in two ways: by sharing Ann's recipe and offering a copy of her fantastic book.

First, the recipe...

Chicken pot pie with parsley biscuits

Serves four

For the chicken stew:
2 tablespoons butter
3 tablespoons olive oil, divided
2/3 cup flour
1/4 cup cream sherry (optional)
5 cups chicken broth
1 onion, peeled and chopped
1 lb white button mushrooms, diced
1 lb asparagus, ends snapped off, and cut into 1-inch segments
3/4 cup frozen peas
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
4 cups roast chicken, diced
Salt and pepper

Parsley yogurt biscuits:
1 1/2 cups flour
1 teaspoon sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup chopped parsley
2 oz cold butter, cut into 1/2-inch cubes
3/4 cup buttermilk, or yogurt (NOT Greek-style, or strained)

Preheat the oven to 425ºF.

In a large pot, heat the butter and 2 tablespoons olive oil over medium-low heat. Add the flour and cook over low heat for 2-3 minutes, stirring constantly. Add the sherry (if using) and allow the alcohol to evaporate. Add the chicken broth and simmer, stirring often, until the sauce is thick.

Meanwhile, warm the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil in a sauté pan. Add the onion and sauté until fragrant. Add the mushrooms, asparagus, peas, and dried thyme. Season with salt and pepper. Sauté until the vegetables are tender, about 10 minutes.

Stir the vegetables into the sauce, along with the chicken. Taste and adjust seasonings. 

Place the stew in a 9″ x 13″ ceramic baking dish.

Make the biscuits. Stir together the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, and parsley. Blend in the butter with your fingertips until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs. Add the yogurt and stir with a fork until the dough comes together—it will be sticky, with bits of flour on the side of the bowl. I like to knead the dough a couple of times in the bowl to bring everything together.

Turn the dough onto a lightly floured surface. Using gentle, floured fingertips, pat the dough into an 8-inch x 10-inch rectangle, about 1-inch thick. Cut the dough into 2 to 3-inch squares (or use the rim of a 2-inch juice glass). 

Arrange the biscuits on top of the stew. 

Bake for 15-20 minutes until the biscuits are golden and the stew is bubbly around the sides.

Now, that you're appropriately hungry, get ready for a delicious giveaway...

What's your favorite memory associated with French food? 

Answer in the comment box below by November 20 for a chance to receive a copy of Ann's wonderful Mastering the Art of French Eating!

Lucky number 42

I’ve always known I’m lucky. And I knew 42 was going to be a good year. The first hours of my birthday confirmed both.

I woke up to the sweet embrace of my husband and the 4-week-old grunts of my sweet daughter. Then I got to hop in the shower before mothering duties beckoned.

When I came out to the living room, it was like Christmas morning. Andrew had gotten pretzel croissants (and chocolate chip cookies for later!) from City Bakery and warmed them up in the oven. That alone made my day.

But then there were gifts. Cards (yep, Parker got me a birthday card, too). More love and weepy moments.

It’s been my middle-aged, modern version of this:

Kindred spirits

It’s been interesting watching Milo watch Parker these past few weeks. He’s curious yet aloof; aware and needy, but giving us and her a wide berth. I’m not sure if he’s displeased to be bounced from his throne, or is looking out for the new family member.

One thing for sure: their body language and daily routines are strikingly similar. 

Out into the sunshine

We’ve taken Parker to the pediatrician several times but, remarkably, hadn’t just taken her out for a walk yet. Today, a bright, sunny autumn day, was just the day. If only to put her in this cute little coat (thank you, Ben & Merrill!).

Then we took our little bear out in the ’hood. The farmers market was in full swing.

The sidewalk along the park was full of life.

And while fall comes late to the city, certain trees are radiant with color.

But by then, the bear was hibernating. Time to go home and eat again.

A surreal existence

Amazing how quickly a week can pass. Especially given that life has become an hourly preoccupation: watching the clock to abide by Parker’s feeding schedule. Catching a 30, 60 or 90 minute nap when possible. And otherwise, just pretty much… watching her.

There are a lot of things I never knew about newborns. Like, 'cluster feeding' - those first few days when they want to feed hourly and are utterly insatiable and you start hallucinating at 4am because you’re on some weird spin cycle of nursing, again and again and again without any sleep.

That their 'daytime' is the middle of the night so everything is copacetic while the world is awake, and you’re all alone – and awake! sometimes hallucinating! – while the rest of the world sleeps.

I’ve been cycling between two sets of pajamas, I drink tea to stimulate milk production, I haven't touched makeup or hair products, and have been outside a total of probably 90 minutes in 10 days. It’s very surreal, indeed. 

That said, it, and she, is lovely. 

Parker has an awesome disposition and is sweet and adorable, with her little facial expressions and chicken legs. And as surreal as it all is, I’m loving it, exactly for what it is: this really bizarre, once-in-a-lifetime (in my case) phase where up is down and you're forgiven for losing touch with reality because there's nothing else you can do but tend to the needs of seven pounds of helplessness. Nothing is expected of you except being where you are, loving and caring for her.

This is life.